And now, in a continuation of Beanie Is A PotterDork, I present to you...
Why Oliver Wood Is Going To Die
Sad, but true!
Well, maybe not entirely, but it's the most likely of the avaliable options.
Let's discuss:
Books 1-3. We meet Oliver, get to know him a bit, fall in love with how rad he is, la la~ He's the captain, he's not really all that close to Harry that we're shown, but he's there. Then in book 3 Oliver graduates and is So Long. ...but wait!
Book 4. Harry runs into Oliver at the World Quidditch Cup. Not only that, but we are told that Oliver got signed as a reserve to Puddlemere United. And that's the last we hear of Oliver, until...
Book 5. Surprise!! Oliver gets a nice mention several times in relation to the Gryffindor Quidditch Team, and a nod to his mad skills in that Ron isn't up to snuff; but more importantly, twice we are reminded that Oliver got signed to PUDDLEMERE UNITED:
"You know what?" Harry said to Ron and Hermione as they entered the Great Hall. "I think we'd better check with Puddlemere United whether Oliver Wood's been killed during a training session, because she seems to be channeling his spirit." (Oliver. Killed. Foreshadowing?!) (264)
"And Wood told you not to be a gentleman and knock me off my broom if you had to," said Cho, smiling reminiscently. "I heard he got taken on by Pride of Portree, is that right?"
"Nah, it was Puddlemere United, I saw him at the World Cup last year." (557)
The second time, it's almost like a specific and obvious reminder. No, no, it's PUDDLEMERE UNITED! PUDDLEMERE UNITED. (And why is Cho smiling reminiscently while she's thinking about Oliver? That floozy!) But then that's the last we hear about Oliver, 'cause he's just a minor character. ...just kidding!
Book 6. Seemingly out of the blue, he gets brought back up. Everybody is sitting around Ron's bed as he was just Nearly Dead, talking about who might have poisoned him, and:
"I can't see anyone trying to bump off a Quidditch team," said George.
"Wood might've done the Slytherins if he could've got away with it," said Fred fairly. (403)
Discussion about bumping off a Quidditch team, and, for what otherwise has no apparent reason except to stuff his name into the book somewhere (since Alicia has graduated now, we sadly can't make any references to him sending her dirty radar love letters through Owl Post), Oliver gets a mention.
Okay, so let's put this all together! We've been told - repeatedly - that Oliver now belongs to Puddlemere United. Other noteable mentions include checking to see if he'd been killed during a training session with the team, and directly after mention of "bump off a Quidditch team."
Gasp!
Oliver is going to die. The whole of Puddlemere United is going to die.
Other options:
a) Oliver WON'T die, but the whole of Puddlemere IS going to be attacked. And we're going to think Oliver is dead, since we've been beaten over the head with the fact that he plays for Puddlemere, but then be told he isn't dead. Because he rocks. Semi-likely, if we're taking the above as foreshadowing. Similarly, could Oliver be the character JKR decided to give a reprieve and not kill?
b) Because she wants us to remember him, as he's going to make an appearance in the last book (the least of which will include making out with Alicia.) Also semi-likely, though probably Not Going To Happen; many people want/expect a reunion of the DA, and if a bunch of old characters are getting together, why not Oliver, too? Plus, he has notable assets for either DA-going-after-Voldemort, or DA-as-part-of-The-Order:
- He's got a tactical mind. We've been told he runs his practices with a specific flavour based on the team they're facing next, and approaches the maneuvers they practice with knowledge on "this is how the enemy acts; this is what we do to combat that."
- He's trustworthy - probably. You can't count on just anybody, but this guy was there from the beginning and has always had faith in Harry to win in for them.
- He's just old enough to remember Voldemort the first time.
- Hello, broomsticks? I just have this picture in my mind of a war with both ground forces and air forces.
- He kicks ass as a Keeper. Okay, this might not have anything to do with big battles against Voldemort, but since we're listing Oliver's assets...
c) because she wanted to tell us Oliver is capable of trying to knock off the Slytherin's, so he's got an evil streak, and maybe he'll go evil on us or something (if this happens I will personally hunt JKR down and MAKE her issue a retraction on her horrible destruction of Wood's character.) I like to imagine this is Not At All Likely, but you never know.
d) JKR merely wants to constantly remind us of Oliver because she loves him almost as much as I do. ...it's possible!
or e) Nothing. He won't die; we might not even hear about him in the last book. It's just funny. We're supposed to laugh and think fondly of Oliver and his obsession. I will file this under "semi-likely, but weird." Weird because it is pretty strange that she brought him up in every single book for no real reason.
And there you have it. Why Oliver Wood Is Going To Die, or various other options on his character in Book 7.
(Should Oliver not die: he and Alicia get the hook up, marry, and live happily ever after. She stays off the pitch but is highly involved in his career until he retires and replaces Madam Hooch as Hogwart's flight instructor and Quidditch ref. She then starts up a career in publicity and gets involved with an All-Witches school, and takes much delight when her personal project, interschool Quidditch, reaches fruition.
They have no kiddos together. Oliver dies first.)
Oliver Wood and the Deathly Hallows
